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What Does Self-Government Mean As A Mother?

What does self-government mean as a mother? In this article, we're going to be talking about mothers and what the essence of a mother really is and what she brings to her family and her home, and how self-government can better help her to become the best version of herself. So, what is a mother? You know I think that people have a misconception of mothers. 

I think the mother has been fighting to preserve her identity for so many years now that people are mislabeling her mother. People are thinking mother is domestic goddess or mother is a chauffeur or mother is a hairdresser or a mother is, you know, filling the blank, a cook, she runs the laundromat at the house, you know, I don't know. People start feeling in these terms that are just related to the world outside of the home when they try to describe mother, but you'll never hit the essence of what mother really is by looking for some job description for who she is because the true role of mother is more powerful than any job or occupation could ever be. 

Mother literally has the sacred duty and obligation, the privilege really of scripting the lives of other individuals of telling him this is true, this is false, right, wrong, good, bad. She gets to morally ground the individuals that will come after her. She gets to pave the way for a future society. There is no other person, no lawmaker, president, dictator, nobody who is more powerful than mother and you know what? All the lawmakers, presidents, and dictators they know that. And so for years now everybody has been attacking mother but let's appreciate who mother really is. 

Before I get to the self-government part of being a mother and how self-government can help a mother, I do want to just mention a little bit more about who a mother really is. Mother is the heart and hearthstone of her family. She is a nurturer, whether she goes to the office in the day or whether she's home the whole day, whether she homeschools her children, or whether her children go to another place to go to school. Mother is the person who they come to for that shoulder. She's the confidant, she's the one that they trust to keep them safe. She is a type of protector. 

So, the mother is absolutely vital at turning the children's hearts toward goodness and she has their hearts a 100% they are hers when they are young unless she allows the children to turn their hearts away from her. If she allows the children to get engrossed in lots of media, be with friends way too often, that kind of thing, then the mother will actually unseat herself in the heart and mind of the child. So, that's the power that a mother has, that's who a mother really is, now how does self-government help a mother? 

So, the best version of a mother is the self-governed mother. It really is. The mother is not affected by little tantrums or attitude problems. She knows how to handle them, she knows how to steer her children, she has absolute confidence, which means that she's calm. She has conscious power, she focuses on what's most important and is constantly presenting this to her family unit, which is a self-governed mother. 

That means mom can't lose control so how do you help the mom not lose control? I know we're all human, I have a really fiery personality just by nature of who I am. I had to control that and at the end of this article, I'm going to give you a gift so that you can help have more control over that for yourself as well. I had to learn the power of calmness for me. I had to learn how to not be reactive anymore and to jump into power struggles which meant that I needed words that I could say that would help me not use the old words that I have habits of in my mind. I literally sat down and wrote on a piece of paper, I planned out word for word what I would say when I correct my children, I planned it out. In fact, I have card sets like that on my website that people can go and get the cue phrases that I would use. 

Now, they're not going to be as beneficial if you don't have the course of the book to tell you what those cues are going toward but I made myself cues so that I wouldn't forget who I was and what I was trying to be for the children. I was their teacher, not their disciplinarian. Life wasn't about the bad things the children did but who they were becoming, that meant I needed to see myself in the same light. I needed to control myself and regulate myself. So, I decided to teach myself the skills I needed, to write them down, to present them to the children, and then to tell them this is what I'm going to use and if I do not use these skills if I am not calm like I've told you that I will be because I'm using these skills, then you have permission to disagree appropriately with me about it and to remind me hey mom, I think you might not be being calm right now. 

Mom, I'm pretty sure you're not self-governing right now. I allowed my children to hold me accountable. I told everyone how I would be and then I started on the path of being that way even if I wasn't perfect every time. Now, let's talk real world here. In the real world, mom's gonna mess up sometimes. She's not gonna be perfect and this article class isn't about being a perfect mom. So, what do you do if you're not self-governing one minute?.

Well, you redo it. If you recognize that you messed up, that you didn't use one of the skills you wanted to use, then you say okay, everybody stop. I can see right now I'm not being calm, I'm not self-governing and so I need to redo that. You just correct, you course correct right in front of the children so that they see the example of self-government in you. Parents don't have to know everything, they just need to be the example of true principle and they need to tell the children that it's possible and teach them the skills that they need for success and mom, you are key in that. You are the one that holds the heart of your children, don't forget that. Their hearts will turn toward goodness if they have turned toward you and your teaching first. 

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